Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock.

Scissors cuts paper. Paper covers rock. Rock crushes lizard. Lizard poisons Spock. Spock smashes scissors. Scissors decapitates lizard. Lizard eats paper. Paper disproves Spock. Spock vaporizes rock. Rock crushes scissors.

The Decline of Western Televisation

I'm the first to admit that I never would have thought I would be a weekly watcher of One Tree Hill but, hey, it kind of just happened. My girlfriend, Ana, bought the first season awhile ago and the next thing you know I'm Tivo-ing season 6. It's not the best show on TV but it's entertaining. I've invested so much time in it already that I can't just walk away. I'm going down with the ship. Although recently a new character emerged on the show who looked mighty familiar. Why yes, it's John Doe from one of my favorite bands, X! Apparently he's also an actor on top of a musical genius. So if John Doe, the LA punk icon of the 80's, is on the show I feel a little less ashamed watching the show. Crisis averted. Masculinity in tact, although pay no mind to John Doe's mesh shirt above. Here's a clip of X from the punk documentary The Decline of Western Civilization.

Tivo: The HawlendRion Chronicles

Oh how I love Monday nights ever since the fall TV season started up recently. I get my triple dose of action via idiot box in the form of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, Prison Break, Heroes and One Tree Hill. TV on DVD has certainly spoiled me but the new seasons are great so far. I think Wednesday, Friday and Saturday are the only nights Tivo isn't overloading. Tomorrow night is Fringe, an awesome sci-fi show from my favorite creator/producer JJ Abrams. Wednesday is a night to spend time with my loved ones, my computer... Thursday is The Office, Grey's Anatomy, and It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia and Sunday stars my favorite superhero- Dexter. All the while I'm still trying to find time to watch The X-Files. 30 Rock starts up soon enough, so let's throw that in there somewhere while we're at it. Lest we forget the classics that are always lighting up Tivo red, Seinfeld, King of Queens, The Colbert Report, Everybody Loves Raymond and probably a few others. I heart Tivo. I believe Tivo will eventually become Skynet. You heard it here first folks. Beware.

It's Always Hilarious In Philadelphia

A new show I just got in to recently is It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. Holy jeez, it's effin brilliant. It's like Seinfeld on crack after shooting up some Family Guy then smoking a bowl of Curb Your Enthusiasm. It's quite a party. The plot and subject matter of each episode is so far out there for a live action show it's hard to believe. For example, the gang finds a baby in the dumpster and instead of calling the cops they decide to profit from it by making it into a Gerber Baby only to find out that white babies are no longer selling, that in fact, Latin and black babies are the current trend. So they decide to take it to a tanning salon only to be turned away but in the end they try to paint the baby's skin with shoe polish before child services shows up. I think my heart almost stopped beating on a few episodes from laughing so hard. I bought the first 3 seasons on DVD and cranked those out in a few days. Season 4 just started last week on FX. I give it 3 thumbs up.

The X-Files: I Want To Believe In This Movie

Since I am captivated in the X-Files world at the moment, watching disc after disc of Mulder and Scully sexual tension and alien chasing, the new movie didn't entirely disappoint me but I can see how fans who have been away from the series the past 7 or 8 years could be. SPOILER ALERT: The story is a stand alone case involving a psychic pedophile Catholic preacher who is the only link to find a series of missing women, one of whom is an FBI agent. At this point in time, Mulder and Scully are no longer working for the FBI but are called in to assist finding the missing women because of their successful history with the X-Files and pyschic phenomenon. The movie is a long monster of the week episode but Mulder and Scully don't even have their FBI credentials or guns to get things done. The second story arch involves Mulder and Scully's personal relationship and whether they should call it off or not because Mulder's heart and time is still very much into exposing the truth and Scully is over the whole thing. I enjoyed the movie because it's just more X-Files to watch but I believe they could have and should have focused on the mythology storyline and given some closure and pay off to long time fans of the series.

Currently Watching: The X-Files

About a week or so ago I picked up The X-Files the complete series on DVD. As of now I am about to start disc 6 of season 1 to watch the last 4 episodes. I watched the series when it was on TV but I was something like 11 years old. It kicked ass back then because it had aliens, monsters, and guns but now that I'm older I can watch it and appreciate the complex stories and of course the aliens, monsters, and guns. I remember things here and there but for the most part it's like watching it for the first time all over again which is incredibly exciting. The box set came with all 9 seasons, the theatrical movie, a comic book, episode guide, collectible cards, and a full sized poster of the movie. Not too shabby. I got a pretty sweet deal at CostCo for only $120 as opposed to $180 regularly. Each season on its own is at least about $40 plus the movie which is probably $10 so I think I got my money's worth. I know for a fact I won't be done watching everything before the movie, The X-Files: I Want To Believe, comes out in theatres July 25th. Looks like I'll be living and breathing government conspiracies for the next few months.

The Office

This past week I stayed home from work for about 4 days with the flu. It was horrible. Instead of enjoying my time away from the office environment, I subconsciously chose to re-watch episodes from The Office to get my daily fix of phones ringing, keyboards typing, and pranks a pulling. Well, everything except the awesome pranks. I wish I had an arch nemesis at work I can pull pranks on... Mike, if you're reading this keep an eye out...